Friday, August 29, 2014

On Friday nights & fan girls

It's Friday night and I am hanging at home tonight. It's been a super busy week with long days at work visiting regional centers, followed by hanging with my friends at night. I feel like I've been "on" all week and tonight I just needed some introvert time. I actually had plans to drive to the mall after work today and as I started down the road my eyelids felt heavy and I heard myself say "this is crazy," so I turned around, went back home, and took a nap.

So here I am paying bills, blogging, and flipping through movies on TV. The Diary of a Mad Black Woman, Oceans 11, Julie & Julia, The Lake House.

Oceans 11 reminds me that I still love George and I love Nora Ephron's Julie & Julia.

I posted the above picture of George on my Instagram with hashtag #futureMrsGeorgeClooney because I am that crazy and because there will be a Mrs. Clooney very soon, which was so unexpected, but I am happy for them. The day People Magazine broke the news of Amal and George's engagement my mom texted me to tell me and asked if I was okay. I laughed and then felt strangely sad, because that's what crazy girls do when they have crushes on famous people. Friends later texted me to see how I was doing. It's all kind of hilarious.

In other crazy Carrie pop culture news - Angelina Jolie finally married Brad Pitt. Very happy for them. I hope his parents and her brother were there.

Nice to have a night in and be quiet for a bit. Needed some time to just be and process several things that are happening right now.

From my couch to yours, happy weekend.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

On feminism and Beyonce

Today marks the 94th anniversary of the 19th amendment giving women the right to vote. It's such a monumental day, but I think 94 years later, some people still don't get what women's equality means. 

The way I see it, our generation thinks that women's equality - that feminism - is about sexuality. The right to flaunt one's body and not be objectified, the right to be intimate and not be labeled a slut, the right to own one's body when making decisions about reproduction. I don't disagree (to some extent) that women should be able to act and do with their bodies whatever their male counterparts do. But I am frustrated that women are missing the point. 

Feminism is not about equal sexual freedoms. Feminism is about so much more. 

The rights our suffragette sisters fought for in the early 1900's weren't so we would not be called sluts. They fought for our right to use our brain. To grow and develop as people. To have the same opportunities for land and advancement and votes as our brothers had already. They fought for the right to be seen as more than an object. 

Women have always been objectified. We were in the 1900's and we are today, but back then men did it to us and now women do it to themselves and call it "equality" and "power." We call that feminism. When Beyonce performs on a stage with a pole in a sparkling body suit, while her own spoken word about her right to be sexual plays in the background, all while the word feminism is in bold behind her, that is not feminism. 

Women's equality is supposed to usher in a society that is built around not objectifying anyone, whether a women did it on her own or a man did it to her. 

Historians and scholars say the third wave of feminism hasn't fully happened yet. I'd like the third wave of feminism to be one where women own, embrace, fight for, and defend their brains. I'd like for women themselves to fully realize (and show) that they are more than their bodies; they are their minds. Smart is sexy. But smart also proves that we don't have to strive for sexy any longer. We can strive for brave, intelligent, powerful, entrepreneurial, classy, professional, kind, and wise. 

I'd like us, as a culture, to no longer define Beyonce as the poster woman for feminism. I think Susan B. Anthony would agree. 

Monday, December 2, 2013

Carrie-ing on about December

Dear December,

Please go easy on me. You are the month that closes what I have named "the year of change" and there is still one big exciting change left... my sister is getting married. I am incredibly excited for Ashley and Chris to continue their life together and start this next chapter as a married couple in their great town home, with their adorable little puppy, and am honestly looking forward to watching them pledge their life-long commitment to one another in front of all of our loved ones. But please, December, go slowly.

Let me soak in every minute of this month. Let me drive slowly around my neighborhood to gaze at the magic of Christmas lights and smile at the site of lit crosses reminding me of what this Christmas season is really about. Please move slowly through the coming cold temperatures (although it was 75 today, but the weather report says a high of 60 for the rest of this week!). Allow me to soak in last moments as an official family of four and cherish the conversations and laughter. And I pray for a lack of tears and frustration with one another.

Let me enjoy this last month of a year that has brought change to literally every area of my life. I moved into a home with a family where I rent a room, moved out from sharing an apartment with my sister. I got a new boss (technically at the end of 2012, but the effects were mostly in this year) and our department is going through yet another transition. I also got a new job title - Assistant Director of Admissions - and am moving to a new office space at the beginning of the new year. I lost 20 pounds. I started watching less TV. I finally joined a bible study.

Let this last month, December, be a culmination and celebration of all the changes I have had the courage to try this year. Let it be a reminder that God's plans are greater than my own and that His timing is perfect.

December, be a month stored of cherished moments, God-given encouragement, and end 2013 on a positive note of feeling proud of the year, grateful for the lessons, and excited for the fact that 2013 proved - and forced - 2014 to look entirely different. This month, let me continue the positive changes I have made, have a positive strategic mindset for the work challenges to come, and have love, excitement, and patience as I witness my sister become a wife and I gain a brother-in-law. Let there be less tears, more laughter. Less worry, more faith. Less bitterness, more encouragement. Less pessimism, more excitement. But most of all, let me live this month to the fullest and the joy-est and the grateful-est ways that I can.

And please, let there be lots of cold weather (but no rain on Ashley's wedding day in December).


Thursday, March 14, 2013

#cubiclelife wisdom

Today a coworker reminded me that I need to live my life. Prioritize my life. Put me first.

I had confessed that sometimes I worry that I should move closer to my family to enjoy every last day with them because some day we will have no more days together.

She told me that makes sense, but that is their life and I have to cultivate mine.

Then I confessed (what is she the new Pope?) that sometimes oftentimes I don't even know what I want in my own life. That if everything was out the window, I would have no clue what to do or which direction to go.

But I also acknowledged that the older I get the more I start to think my life is going in the direction it should, even if it wasn't the direction I expected.

(sorry for my posting absence and I have no promise on when I'll pick it back up regularly  In the meantime, I will post when inspired or want to remember and don't want to use a pencil.)

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

5 years

Top 10 (or 20) things I’ve learned as an employee:

1. It’s important to know how to use the copy machine.
2. How to craft an email that balances professional, pleading, demanding, and sweet.
3. Organization is everything.
4. Listen to your voicemails every day.
5. You don’t have to respect someone, but you have to be polite.
6. Apologize, but only when it’s truly needed.
7. A “work BFF” makes a world of difference.
8. Only complain to coworkers you trust (those people are your friends).
9. Age has nothing to do with good leadership.
10. Make to do lists.
11. Most decisions are made outside of work (this is networking).
12. Be your own advocate.
13. Keep your integrity at all costs. Do the right thing no matter how risky or unpopular your decision. At the end of the day, you have to know you did everything you could
14. Administrative assistants are the people with the real power. Be nice to them, the office runs because of them.
15. Paychecks really do bring happiness (even though it seems shallow).
16. When you’re angry, take a break.
17. I don’t like to talk work, answer the phone, or make decisions before 9am.
18. Fridays are the longest day of the week.
19.Laughter at the workplace makes a world of difference.
20. Coworkers make or break a job (I’ve been blessed with some really great ones). 

(and now for some seriousness...)

Sunday, January 6, 2013

Dear Amy: The Bachelor via Twitter

Dear Amy,

I am beyond excited that you want to follow twitter during The Bachelor tomorrow. It is now my favorite thing about the show. The problem I have is that my twitter feed is packed with tweets starting at 5, which is complicated because I can’t watch the show until 8. So, the first thing to know is that most people live tweet on east coast time, so finish the dishes and then be prepared to read hilarious tweets backward until 5. The second is to search and use the hashtag #TheBachelor when tweeting (which you did and I am very proud). 

I may have gone a bit overboard on who you should follow while watching, so I’ll start with the most crucial and then list a bunch of Bachelor alum you can check out if you want more tweets.

Also, remember that you love me, even if I am obsessive about twitter and reality TV.

Here is a list of who to follow while watching The Bachelor…

The basics:

Dana Weiss  @Possessionista – the single most important person to follow. She loves to live tweet The Bachelor and also has become twitter friends with most of the cast and they love her live tweets too. Plus, I love her tweets in general, she is one of my favorites to follow.
Jennifer Weiner   @jenniferweiner – she is an author and LOVES live tweeting the show.
lara cohen  @Larakate – not sure if she will live tweet, but I love her tweets in general and she and Dana often go back and forth.
Andrea Lavinthal  @andilavs – ditto to what I said about Lara.
Sean Lowe  @SeanLowe09 – for obvious reasons (since he is THE bachelor), although it probably won’t be too juicy or funny.
Chris Harrison   @chrisbharrison – also for obvious reasons (and I love him).

These next four people work on the show and tweet often throughout: 

My favorite Bachelor alum to follow on twitter:

Jenna Burke  @TheOverAnalyst – one of my favorite tweeters in general and I am sure she’ll be live tweeting.
Ashley S.  @AshleySpivey – from Brad’s season, writes a blog in review of every episode, and is good friends of many Bachelor alum.
Michelle Money  @MoneyMichelle – the “bad” one from Brad’s season, but now I really like her (mostly because of her tweets).
Ali Fedotowsky   @AliFedotowsky – as in Ali the Bachelorette
DeAnna Stagliano  @DeAnnaPappas – DeAnna the Bachelorette

Other alum to look into:

Molly Mesnick   @MollyMesnick – as Molly and Jason
Kacie Boguskie  @kacielynnb – sweet Kacie B from Ben’s season
Michael Stagliano   @MichaelStag – was on The Bachelorette, but I don’t remember him, however, he was also on both seasons of Bachelor Pad and is a fan favorite for someday being The Bachelor.
William Holman  @WilliamFHolman – also a Bachelor alum from Ashley’s season and I find him witty and sometimes charming.
Emily Maynard   @EmilyMaynard – we’ll see if she tweets since she “broke his heart.”
Trista Sutter   @tristasutter – sometimes she tweets too much and sometimes she annoys me, but she is basically Bachelor royalty.
Natalie Getz  @nataliegetz – also has a write up about every episode (and is a Bachelor alum)